How to plan a group trip (without being the organizer)

Before anyone books, settle four things in writing: who is in, who books each thing, what's fixed versus optional, and where the answers live. Then keep one list of bookings with a name beside each and the people attached. That list ends most of the messages that start with "what time are we leaving".

This is for the person who ends up running a trip for four to twelve people, whether or not they wanted the job. It doesn't cover picking a destination by vote or splitting the money, which are separate problems that need their own tools.

The 14 messages

Say you open your phone and there are 14 unread messages in the group chat. Three of them ask what time you're leaving Thursday. One asks whether Lee is on the rental car. One is a photo of a menu. You know the answers, and so does the person who asked last week. The trouble is that the answers live in your head and in six email threads, so every question comes to you.

Example: the one page that stops the questions

An illustration for a group of six. Every row answers two questions at once: whose job is it, and who does it involve. The dinner row is the one that saves an argument, because Tom knew he was skipping it and nobody else did.

The method

1. List everyone who is definitely in, and everyone who is a maybe with a date you'll stop waiting. A maybe with no deadline holds up every booking.
2. List what needs booking: transport, lodging, anything with a reserved time. For each, name one person who makes the booking. Not who pays, who makes it.
3. Mark each item fixed or optional. Flights and lodging are usually fixed. Everything else should be optional in plain words, so nobody feels obliged to join the museum.
4. Write down who is on each booking. Four on the flight, three in the car, five at the dinner. This is the step people skip, and it's the one that stops someone discovering at the airport that they were never on a booking.
5. Note what each person needs once: meals, a seat, mobility, medication that changes timing. Recorded against the person, it's there when a booking is made, not remembered afterward.
6. Put the answers on one page and send that page, not a link to a chat. See how to write a one-page trip itinerary for the layout.

Three messages worth having ready

Use them as written or change the words. The point is to say what you'll do and by when.

When something moves, it moves for some of you

The hard part comes when something moves. A delayed flight affects the four people on it, not the two who came separately, and working out who to tell is a job of its own. Look up what depends on what, the way what else your trip depends on does, then add one question: which of these people are on it? If the group splits across stops, organising a multi-stop trip without a spreadsheet helps with the dependencies.

What can go wrong

• One person books everything and everyone assumes they know the details. Spread the booking, but keep the page in one place.
• Optional things drift into being mandatory. Say "optional" out loud.
• Someone isn't on a booking they thought they were. Check the who's-on-it column before the week of travel.
• Half the group never opens the shared document. Print or send the page, and see what to keep on paper when you travel.
• Money. Nothing here settles who owes whom, and we'd settle that before deposits go down, in writing.

What the Companion does with this

Travel Companion holds one traveler list, links each booking to the people actually on it, and keeps each person's requirements, such as meals or a seat. When you record a change to one booking, it shows what was built on top of it, so working out who to tell starts from what's recorded. It's one person's record, not a shared one: travelers don't get accounts, and there's no share link. To hand the shape of the trip to the others, send the itinerary PDF or the one-page trip card. It also doesn't split costs. See the Travel Companion page.

Questions people ask